The boy is 5!

My kids have changed my life forever.

Jake came to us 5 years ago.

It's amazing how much my life has changed since then. It's amazing how much I have grown in so many ways. I thank my Jake, Allie and Sam for that.

I was thinking tonight about the person I was 5 years ago. When we brought Jake home from the hospital I started losing sleep at night worrying that I would wake up and find that he had died in the night. I walked into his room a dozen times a night and felt his chest to see if he was still breathing. I remember hearing a talk about having faith...that fear and faith cannot exist together. I knew that I was going to have to let that fear go. I knew that I had to have faith that even if the worst happened, I could put myself in God's hands and we would all be okay. I made a decision that I would trust in God. I have really grown since then.

We recently had the primary program in our ward and I heard the words to the song they have been practicing all year. I'm going to include the words here in case you haven't heard the song.

The Family is of God.

Our Father has a family. It’s me! It’s you, all the others too: we are His children.

He sent each one of us to Earth, through birth to live and learn here in families.

God gave us families

To help us become what He wants us to be.

This is how He shares His love,

For the family is of God.

A father’s place is to preside, provide, to love and teach the gospel to his children.

A father leads in family prayer, to share their love for Father in Heaven.

God gave us families

To help us become what He wants us to be.

This is how He shares His love,

For the family is of God.

A mother’s purpose is to care, prepare, to nurture and to strengthen all her children.

She teaches children to obey, to pray, to love, and serve in the family.

God gave us families

To help us become what He wants us to be.

This is how He shares His love,

For the family is of God.

I’ll love and serve my family, and be a good example to each family member.

And when I am a Mom or Dad, so glad, I’ll help my family remember.

God gave us families

To help us become what He wants us to be.

This is how He shares His love,

For the family is of God.

I sat and listened to those words and let the tears roll down my face. I grew up with an amazing family and I love them. So as I listened to the words of that song, I knew that God gave me my family. I knew that He gave me Mike. He loaned me his precious children Jake, Allie, and Sam. I have a responsibility to be their Mom here on this earth. I feel like that responsibility is enormous. My job is to care, to nurture, and to prepare them to be how He wants them to be. He let me have these kids to show me that He loves me, and to help me become what He wants me to be.

Anyway, this is not turning out to be about Jake...and it should be because it started out that way, but I wanted to share some of the feelings I have been having lately. I am so glad that Jake is mine. He is a good boy and he is learning how to make his way in this life. I hope I can continue to let faith guide my way. I hope that I can help him learn and grow. I hope that he will always know that I love him and that I feel blessed to have a child of God in our home.